date: 21st sept..2005
time: 2:10am

am sick,, :( flu cough fever.. :(
Temp: 101F noted at 1:45am
Med: taking antibiotics

after ma aftari i went to sabiha’s engagement.. im not gonna write detailz here coz im simply feeling pathetic at the moment.. bushra wanted me to come so i had to..afterwise i was feeling damn sick.. n there i wasnt able to decide how to react…i was smiling..inside crying.. n this is wht i really abhor.. i hate facing such situations… anyways..im happy for her.. God bless her always.. n her fiance as welll..

hmm.. i donno where the hell im getting this feeling.. “i hate myself” .. somewhere somehow i have started hating myself for wht im..n for wht ppl have made me.. feeling so pitiable, awfull n fraustrated .. :( wanna write each n every feeling but i wont;.. coz this too is gonna be an issue.. i badly want someone here with me.. :( n this too is the feeling i hate.. u know this feeling crop up the feeling of “having a sister”.. i wish i had one.. :( *sigh* .. but see such a pity..i cant even express THIS feeling in front of anyone..not even my parents.. anyways.. better not ask me anything.. u ppl know how am i like..i’ll be ok soon.. and PLZ dont make this entry an issue..its just the fraustration that speaks..

anyways.. tc…babye..